Nick Hart

Ensemble since 2014

I fantasize about living in a vast overwhelming castle mansion house made out of Legos, a complex with millions upon millions of rooms, with an IMAX theatre and Chipotle above it, with bat-poles leading to secret library rooms of CD collections because I don’t like throwing things away, those things used to be expensive. Or hidden trap cellar doors that slide into a basement the size of the pentagon and its filled with a billion empty cubby holes.

Someone says “But what if you have a stroke in the secret room behind the secret bookshelf behind the real bookshelf and you bite your tongue off and bleed and bleed and your bloody tongue stump gets infected with mold and parasites and you die because no one could find you in your secret Lego rooms.”

I never thought about this. And now I can’t have that dream anymore.

I like to play chess. I was raised by a Nintendo Gameboy. No, the brick one, stupid.

Stuff by Nick

Goth Bro Praying Mantis

I wrote this play tuesday afternoon knowing what the election turnout would be by friday

An Attempt at a Moment of Pure Condensed and Concentrated Joy

Just Me Talking to Brenda

Top Thrill Dragster at Cedar Point is 30 meters shorter than the Great Pyramid of Giza.

This Is A Play About Geometry

sometimes I think about rabbit, and eeyore, and hundred acre wood, and know that those were simpler times and they were meaningless and now they are gone.

Cold Pre Game Show

Nobody Got No Money For A Dental Plan